It's been 365 days since Jordan departed this mortal sphere. The earth has made one full revolution around the sun, and many of our days have revolved around thoughts of him, the son, brother, husband and friend we cherish. He was here one minute, and gone the next. There wasn't time to say a lot to each other. Our scant words seemed inadequate. But in those last moments, I knew like I've never known before, the strength and power of eternal love. I believe now that the words that carried the very strongest message, were said years before in a temple of God. That is where the covenants were made that sealed us into an eternal family unit, dependent upon our faithfulness.
During this year, my mind has been filled with wonderings about what it's like for Jordan. If only I could have a dream, an email, a message, something to let me know how he's doing! Twelve days ago, I chanced upon a message that could be from Jordan. When I heard it, I recognized it immediately and thought of him. Long ago, our boys watched The Snoweman around Christmastime on PBS together. I'd forgotten all about it until I heard the mysteriously enchanting song again. We'd been drawn to that melody, often humming it absent-mindedly. But here it was again. Could this be what Jordan did after his spirit was loosed from the confines of earth? Could this be a hint of future adventures we might have together? I remember when Jordan and I went to the Grant County Fair together when he was 10 years old. For that evening, it was almost as if he became older, and I became younger, so that we wandered the fairgrounds like peers, eating Spaceburgers and letting ourselves be spun silly by the carnival rides. I imagine that Jordan has taken at least one spin around the world since he left us, and I am picturing that he and I, and anyone else who wants to come along, will do a world tour together ourselves someday. It may just be something like this!
Sunday, May 10, 2009
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